The 18th Birthday

So when you turn eighteen in Britain, you're then allowed to legally drink. My birthday wasn't really like that at all.
First off, i had to go to school like any other normal day (boo, hiss) but then i got to come home to one of the best parts of birthdays. The presents. That does make me sound slightly selfish but i swear im more of a giver than receiver. But i can't exactly go about giving gifts on my birthday (people would think i'm weird).
My mum got me a new digital camera because my old one is a bit slow and glitchy, with a burnt lense... heh heh. Also with the digital camera i got prescription sunglasses which are a necessity and three different journals which i love because they're all unique and amazing.

From left: 5 year question journal, quotations book, book of opinions of humanity

All the journals in size order

I got other awesome presents including a lovely back from my sister and lots of moneys from my dad because i hadn't really asked him for anything and he didn't want to risk it.

The pretty bag! Along with other girfts

There was no way i was going to have any type of house party whatsoever. People getting drunk and being annoying and spilling things and vomiting and generally being careless around a clean house that i have to clean up afterwards when it gets filthy, isn't my idea of fun. So i just had a few friends for pizza and chat. Which went rather well i thought, and even had some cute decorations!

Party Poppers & balloons

All the sweets! mmmm

Savoury as well as sweet

 Despite ordering pizza we did all eat a fair amount of the sweets (nobody can just eat one pringle can they) and as the bowls disappeared and our pizza came, we realised we may have bitten off more than we could chew. Better that than some sickly drunks i think anyway!

they light up!!!

Not the best light to see their wonderful glow

 The light up balloons were definitely a highlight. After pizza i turned out all the lights so everyone could see them glowing. The blue and green balloons worked best. Maybe the yellow was a little disappointing.

Bang!

Pop!

 We were meant to use the party poppers during the moment of cake since there weren't many of us. But of course you put them round a table and boys just seem to radiate to them. I did pop one myself but they pretty much used them all while we were eating the pizza.

More hidden party poppers

 I thought it was a good birthday. Who says you need a system full of alcohol to have fun? We did have mini-cocktails (i didn't even like mine) but i'm not such a fan of alcohol. Think it tastes weird. Oh well. Think the weirdest thing is that i'm now classified as an adult haha who thought that one up?

What IS the point?

Do you ever get a bit down in the dumps about anything and possibly everything?

Just sitting thinking what's the point of all this? why am i doing this?
This usually occurs when the sun has set and i should probably be in bed or doing something useful with my time. I clearly have a rocky relationship with my brain, although what teenage girl doesn't? Stop filling me with mood swings and 3am dilemmas! 

I feel like i'm about to go into one of these moods. I started asking myself what is the point of a few things and I've stopped myself. Because i could go into this in as much depth as i wanted. i could stay up all night pondering the points of these activities and things. It may give me an epiphany, but more likely it will just give me a headache and leave me feeling a bit sad.  And what would be the point of that? Eh eh see what i did there?
All that would happen is i would forget it all anyway and continue on. Because i like my hobbies and i am interested the subject i'm going to study and anything else just turns into a philosophical debate... or maybe political depending on what you question.

Sometimes i like to just draw myself quickly to the conclusion that there is no point. It's like i call my own bluff, if i question it and then say Well there is no point. So whatcha gonna do now then?
I'm not that much of a spontaneous, adventurous, daredevil soul. I stick to what i like, i try new things on occasion and if it doesn't suit me that's fine. So i'm not going to suddenly take my 'train of life' if you will, off the tracks. Also when i draw to this conclusion, mainly its more to shut myself up. But if there truly was no point then i guess i wouldn't be doing it. Even if the only point i have is that i have fun doing it. It's still something.

I don't know what the point is for a lot of things (duh). And thinking about the migraine i could get for trying to contemplate this stuff, i wouldn't try and attempt it.

Also i'm sorry if you thought this would answer some deep and meaningful question haha.

Laziness

Its the Easter holidays for me in my last year of high school (hoorah!) and i'm finding it especially hard to concentrate on school work that needs to be done this time.
I'm far more interested in being lazy and playing computer games, but even when i want to be productive and get work done, i would rather do creative work with videos. Of course editing/making videos is fun and doing school work isn't and so that should be the obvious difference.

I just can't understand why my wee bootay wont get itself into gear. 6th year has made me lazy. I used to panic and make sure i knew my stuff for exams and that i was on top of my coursework etc.
Now i have stuff due in less than a week (that's right i have to go to school during Easter holidays...actually i have to PAY to go to school during the holidays) and i'm simply sitting here writing a blog post.
Saying this, I've always ended up putting things off that I've planned to do that could be quite fun and relaxing. Fixing the photos on my wall is one of the things i have been telling myself i will do for months, and it would only take twenty minutes tops. But i simply tell myself i don't have the time (says the girls who stays up until 4am) and that i'll do it later.

Momentarily i'll blame school. School makes me lethargic and tired and awful. I'm a night owl. The worst part about spending a year cramming academic knowledge into my head is that i don't have time to read for enjoyment. I still buy books and they sit there piling up until summer arrives. As soon as summer arrives i can whizz through ten books before another year at school (i can also read a book during the christmas holidays). After school is back my brain is kaaaputt. I cannot read before bed lately because i like to listen to music and get some form of daydream going that i can fall asleep to which stops me going over thought after thought in my head like i used to.

Scrap-booking is something i do on occasion and it's really fun. It's also another thing i've been telling myself i'll do for ages and haven't gotten around to it even though it would be a relaxing hour of cutting and sticking. Mmm gotta love simple arts and crafts.

Now i said i would momentarily blame school. This is because i have been off for six days and i haven't done doodily squat. I haven't read, i haven't fixed my wall, i haven't scrap-booked neither have i caught up on coursework or studied. Why? I am lazy. Although i did work hard filming and editing the first three days and i did go to a party on Tuesday. The party is just an excuse, the filming is a fun hobby.
I've been staying up late doing nothing and so i get up late and do nothing because the day is pretty much gone. Oh the day i can drive, i tell you. So i'll leave with the point of trying to change this. Let you know how i get on if you're reading this!

Also hey there! Welcome to this blog i've had for ages and never really use and will probably abandon again at some point unless all my thoughts can constantly be spilled onto here.

The Familiar

So recently my Dell laptop, which i had been using for roughly four years, decided to abandon me and take all of my files etc with it. Four years of things i had built on this piece of technology all vanished into thin air. (Except photos because I've been smart enough to back them up onto a hard drive religiously)

My Dell now sits under my desk in shame

I'm not prepared to write about how we don't know what we have until its gone and how technology is slowly failing me. Instead let me just have a blabber;
My laptop is dead, no files and not working. So i have moved back to my used-to-be-virus-ridden old laptop, which thankfully i still have lying around. Typing this on a desk I've come back to the annoying use of one of the rubber parts that holds the laptop steady is gone, giving it an undesirable wobble, its a hell of a lot chunkier and the fan is loud and struggling. Yet i find myself getting used to the old clunky keys as if they had never left my fingertips. How strange.

Hello Old friend!

Coming back to this laptop also surprised me when the desktop background popped up, showing a variety of old times. Despite being completely different from the background i had on my other laptop (more photography picturesque) i remembered the background AND i remembered all of the memories it was filled with, even though they ranged from five to six years ago.

It is indeed the little things

The phrase "It's the little things" is scrawled across it, in a font i weirdly recognised (it's the font i now use at the end of my YouTube videos). Now my fourteen year old self may not have been so wise to come up with that phrase on my own (by now its so well known who would?) but it has surprised me about my past self. I tend to still try and look at the little things in life, yet lately i had been forgetting all about them in my state of trying to look at the bigger picture. Which is obviously an important aspect as well; but i had constantly been overwhelming myself with thoughts of school deadlines, leading to exams and grades leading to university and life and everything big and scary and... overwhelming.
It's nice to take a step back and focus on the little things, which i will be especially capable of doing during the summer months since i can abandon all work and school knowledge.

Who knew this clunky abomination compared to the new age of laptops would be getting me through the next few months until i move onto my third replacement for university. We are constantly moving forward with technology in this age and although its good (i'm all for the quirky gadgets) sometimes the old and the familiar and the not so up to date can just save us(me) from being laptopless for months. Which lets face it, would suck completely. Because we may be moving forward and i may need something with more memory and backing storage but the new may not be as faithful as the old. Disappointingly.




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Timelapse

Lately ive been doing timelapse videos with my cameras and if you want to watch them then they are obviously the videos above.
Also i haven't really been doing much apart from schoolwork and dealing with UCAS which is stressful. I was in York but i didnt take any pictures or videos mainly because i've been twice before and im definitely going again.
So if you are actually reading this post, thank you because youre probably the only one and i do prefer tumblr. Right now i'm not so sure why i put up this blog, probably because my tumblr is basically pictures i reblog and not long text posts with my pictures.